你寫我改:BEC評點網友作文(7)1

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本期作文題目:
    You are the manager of a small office. In order to reduce costs and improve the company's environmental practices, you have decided to collect and recycle all paper used in the office.
    Write a memo of 40-50 words:www.Examda.CoM
    informing staff of the new policy.
    explaining how the paper will be collected
    requesting staff to co-operate with the scheme.
    參考作文:
    Sample 48 words
    TO: All staff來源:www.examda.com
    From: Paul Blake
    Please note that from next Monday we are introducing an environmentally friendly scheme. All used paper from the office will be recycled. Used sheets should be placed in the green bin next to the photocopier for collection. All staff ate asked for their full cooperation with this scheme.
    網友作文一:
    TO:All staff
    FROM:Manager來源:考試大
    RE:recycle paper policy
    In order to reduce costs and improve our company's environmental practices,I decide to[1] collect and recycle all paper used in the office.you shoud place your paper in the green box near the fountain before 6 pm on friday,we will recycle them once a week.
    Cooperate please[2].
    _________________________________________
    [1]你不是公司的助理或者負責清潔的吧?怎么自己去collect paper? 改為:it is decided to ....
    [2]這句話應該放在上面一段的最尾。不是please, 而是we need your cooperation.
    網友作文二:
    To: All staff
    From: Mr. Zawww.Examda.CoM
    Here is the new policy aim to[1] reduction the costs[2] and improvement of the environmental practices of our company. Used paper in this office, on effect of this policy, should be collected by one appointed clerk each day for recycle use by selling them to recycle bin for a profit. [3] Please cooperate with this policy for our own good and each one will serve the duty in turn. [4]
    Thank you
    _________________________________________
    [1]結構問題,后面應該是分詞做定語或狀語,改為:aiming to
    [2]反了,應該是:cost reduction 另外,aim to 是個動詞詞組,to 是介詞么? 后面應該是動詞詞組。
    [3]公司要靠賣廢品來取得利潤么?這句話說得可是太掉價了。去掉吧。
    [4]去掉。
    網友作文三:
    To: All staff來源:www.examda.com
    From:Mrs Li
    I would like to inform all of you that we would formulate a new policy of recycling the used paper in order for reducing the official stationery expences and meeting the environment needs. This policy will be implemented on 12.11.08 by putting the used paper in a certain (space)[1] . I hope all staff should could be co-operative with the scheme
    _________________________________________
    [1]如果地點不確定,還不如不說。
    網友作文四:
    TO:all staff
    FROM:Kathywww.Examda.CoM
    DATE: 19,OCT
    SUBJECT: new policy
    I am writing to infome you the new policy about paper using[1] in our office, in order to reduce our expenses and to make our working enviroment better, [2] paper will be collected by ourselives and then reuse them, please put the eused paper in the designated box instead of throwing it directly into the scrap basket, I hope we can co-operate on this policy.
    _________________________________________
    [1]Being used考試大論壇
    [2]這和改善你們的工作環(huán)境毫無關系,去掉。
    網友作文五:
    To: All staffwww.Examda.CoM
    From:Management department
    I am pleased to inform you that [1]all used paper in photocopy or printing could be recyled. As we know there are many papers [2]of which one side could be used again.
    So please put the all-used paper in the red box beside the duplicator. and the one side-blank paper,pls put in the blue box.
    I would like all of you obey the command[3]. Thank you.
    _________________________________________
    [1]公司新政策的發(fā)布不用這么開心,開頭正規(guī)些就可以了。
    [2]這是不可數名詞,there is a lot of paper....
    [3]cooperate