II.如何避免Chinglish,使譯文讀起來像地道的英文
一、首先要吃透中文的精神,擺脫中文字面的束縛,從英語讀者的角度出發(fā),按照英語習(xí)慣,對句子進(jìn)行重組,以清晰的文字表達(dá)原文的意思。
(17)"維護(hù)世界和平是大有希望的。"
a. To maintain world peace is very hopeful. b. There are great hopes for the maintenance of world peace.這兩句基本上是字對字翻譯。
c. The prospect for world peace is very bright. d. The prospects for world peace are very encouraging indeed.后兩句英文比較通順。
(18)"同時(shí),也從一個(gè)角度反映了他們心懷祖國,放眼世界的精神面貌和文化生活。"
初譯:In addition, their pictures reflect, from a certain angle, their mental outlook of having the whole country in mind and the whole world in view as well s their cultural life.改譯:In addition, their pictures reflect, from a certain angle, their mental outlook, their love for the motherland and wide-ranging interest in the world as well as their cultural life.初譯句子用了套語,比較臃腫,不好懂。改譯后比較通順易懂。
二、在工作中有意識地記錄常用語和老大難的譯例。多聽外電、大量閱讀英文原著原文,尤其是關(guān)于中國的文章,看看外國人對同一個(gè)詞、同一個(gè)事物以及成語如何表達(dá),進(jìn)行比較研究后"擇優(yōu)錄取"較貼切的用法,為我所用。(但在借用這些詞匯和表達(dá)方法時(shí),一定要注意其政治傾向和不同的上下文)例如:
(19)"新世紀(jì)即將到來之際",外報(bào)、外電中有很多說法,搜集起來,用時(shí)就方便了。
As the new century approaches On the verge of the new century At the dawn of the new century At the threshould of the new century As the new century is just round the corner
(2)"……增長百分之幾十,有的成倍增長" increase by double-digit percentages or in some cases several-fold如果有具體數(shù)字,譬如:增長了百分之7.4,翻譯不會有任何困難。但"百分之幾十"則不好表達(dá),既然外報(bào)有這種表達(dá)法,而且與中文也恰好吻合,我們拿來用就是了。
(21)bring out the best in people,"人盡其才"通常譯為:put people's talents to the best use,而現(xiàn)英文句型更生動地表達(dá)了"充分發(fā)揮人的能力"的意思(Tichets, priced from…to…)are far out of the reach of the ordinary workers,"望塵莫及" If…, all the other problems would melt away."迎刃而解" A special one-time case"下不為例" Visitors who overstayed their pemnits"客人住宿證明過期" Downsizing for efficiency or cut payroll to increase efficiency "減員增效"上述這些英文說法用的都是小字、短字、簡單字,都比較形象,均可為我所用。
二、閱讀英譯漢文章時(shí),注意搜集常用的詞、短語、句子,查閱英語原文是如何表達(dá),利用reverse or back translation的辦法,不斷積累地道的英語詞匯和句型,也就是:英-漢-英。
(22)"我近常常想到你和貴國"You and your country have been much in my thoughts recently.這個(gè)用法比have often thought of you地道。
(23)"你目睹了中國和世界在本世紀(jì)走過的非凡歷程"You have witnessed the sweep of a remarkable century, both in China and abroad.這里sweep即是"歷程",它比course更為形象,而且有"走過"的動作。
(24)"大力繼承這些遺產(chǎn)并發(fā)揚(yáng)光大"…are dramatically building on this legacy 比inheriting and carrying forward this legacy簡練貼切。
(25)"經(jīng)濟(jì)改革改變了中國的面貌和人民的日常生活"Economic reform…h(huán)as transformed China's landscape and its people's daily lives. Landscape的用法可以效仿。
(26)"美籍華人獨(dú)特的文化和……勤奮觀念加強(qiáng)了我們社會的凝聚力。" Chinese Americans' unique culture and values of … hard work have strengthened the fabric of our society. Fabric的用法值得學(xué)習(xí)。
(27)"每個(gè)國家都得根據(jù)自己的傳統(tǒng)尋找發(fā)展方案。"Each country has to look for development approaches within its own traditions. "Within"可以譯成"根據(jù)",那么在類似情況下,"根據(jù)"也可譯成within.
(28)"在零售和烹調(diào)行業(yè)方面,家辦企業(yè)的買賣完全超過了國家辦的。"In the retail and catering sectors, household operations have completely outmarketed the state. "household operations"和"outmarket"都可拿來為我所用。
四、天下無難事,只怕有心人。培訓(xùn)對語言的濃厚興趣,隨時(shí)隨地學(xué)習(xí)以英語為母語的人在不同場合對不同事物的表達(dá)方式。從中吸收對我有用的東西。
(29)我們在許多不同的場合都用"辛苦了"一詞,而英語國家的人則隨著情況的變化而變換說法。譬如,客人剛抵達(dá)時(shí),主人可以說:Did you have a good trip?某人辛勤工作后,就可以表揚(yáng)他:Thank you for your hard work.或You've been working hard!
但這次江主席在檢閱部隊(duì)時(shí)說,"同志們辛苦了!"(還有"同志們好!")怎樣翻譯,我沒有把握。至于"同志們好!"顯然不能譯成Hello或How are you之類。是否可以譯成:Salute!也許需要問問外國朋友。
再如:客人們抵達(dá)后,外國主人問道,"Would you like to make yourself comfortable?"我想,這正是我們平時(shí)所說"想方便一下么?"
(30)會談對英方人員說,We have to consult the opinions of a wide cross-section of people.這正是我們所說的"我們必須廣泛聽取各界人士的意見。"
(31)"憑票入場"外國人用"Admission is by ticket only."我們可以舉一反三,將"憑柬上一號觀禮臺"譯成"Admission by card only"or "Please present this card."Venue: Reviewing Stand 總之,各種各樣的英文材料、廣告、路標(biāo)、宣傳品等等都可作為學(xué)習(xí)材料。
后一點(diǎn),要跟上飛速發(fā)展的時(shí)代,不斷學(xué)習(xí)新出現(xiàn)的詞匯和知識。僅舉幾個(gè)例子。
(32)Quickionary 掃描器字典Telephovision 電視電話A not -for -profit group 非贏利集團(tuán)Megatrends Asia 《亞洲大趨勢》Quantum Fund 量子基金Hedge Fund 對沖基金
如果要從根本上來解決,還需要提高譯者的綜合素質(zhì),尤其是語言素質(zhì)和修養(yǎng),不僅漢語要好,英語尤要精通,而且知識面要廣。一般說來,譯者英語的造詣越深,其譯文中的Chinglish就越少。
一、首先要吃透中文的精神,擺脫中文字面的束縛,從英語讀者的角度出發(fā),按照英語習(xí)慣,對句子進(jìn)行重組,以清晰的文字表達(dá)原文的意思。
(17)"維護(hù)世界和平是大有希望的。"
a. To maintain world peace is very hopeful. b. There are great hopes for the maintenance of world peace.這兩句基本上是字對字翻譯。
c. The prospect for world peace is very bright. d. The prospects for world peace are very encouraging indeed.后兩句英文比較通順。
(18)"同時(shí),也從一個(gè)角度反映了他們心懷祖國,放眼世界的精神面貌和文化生活。"
初譯:In addition, their pictures reflect, from a certain angle, their mental outlook of having the whole country in mind and the whole world in view as well s their cultural life.改譯:In addition, their pictures reflect, from a certain angle, their mental outlook, their love for the motherland and wide-ranging interest in the world as well as their cultural life.初譯句子用了套語,比較臃腫,不好懂。改譯后比較通順易懂。
二、在工作中有意識地記錄常用語和老大難的譯例。多聽外電、大量閱讀英文原著原文,尤其是關(guān)于中國的文章,看看外國人對同一個(gè)詞、同一個(gè)事物以及成語如何表達(dá),進(jìn)行比較研究后"擇優(yōu)錄取"較貼切的用法,為我所用。(但在借用這些詞匯和表達(dá)方法時(shí),一定要注意其政治傾向和不同的上下文)例如:
(19)"新世紀(jì)即將到來之際",外報(bào)、外電中有很多說法,搜集起來,用時(shí)就方便了。
As the new century approaches On the verge of the new century At the dawn of the new century At the threshould of the new century As the new century is just round the corner
(2)"……增長百分之幾十,有的成倍增長" increase by double-digit percentages or in some cases several-fold如果有具體數(shù)字,譬如:增長了百分之7.4,翻譯不會有任何困難。但"百分之幾十"則不好表達(dá),既然外報(bào)有這種表達(dá)法,而且與中文也恰好吻合,我們拿來用就是了。
(21)bring out the best in people,"人盡其才"通常譯為:put people's talents to the best use,而現(xiàn)英文句型更生動地表達(dá)了"充分發(fā)揮人的能力"的意思(Tichets, priced from…to…)are far out of the reach of the ordinary workers,"望塵莫及" If…, all the other problems would melt away."迎刃而解" A special one-time case"下不為例" Visitors who overstayed their pemnits"客人住宿證明過期" Downsizing for efficiency or cut payroll to increase efficiency "減員增效"上述這些英文說法用的都是小字、短字、簡單字,都比較形象,均可為我所用。
二、閱讀英譯漢文章時(shí),注意搜集常用的詞、短語、句子,查閱英語原文是如何表達(dá),利用reverse or back translation的辦法,不斷積累地道的英語詞匯和句型,也就是:英-漢-英。
(22)"我近常常想到你和貴國"You and your country have been much in my thoughts recently.這個(gè)用法比have often thought of you地道。
(23)"你目睹了中國和世界在本世紀(jì)走過的非凡歷程"You have witnessed the sweep of a remarkable century, both in China and abroad.這里sweep即是"歷程",它比course更為形象,而且有"走過"的動作。
(24)"大力繼承這些遺產(chǎn)并發(fā)揚(yáng)光大"…are dramatically building on this legacy 比inheriting and carrying forward this legacy簡練貼切。
(25)"經(jīng)濟(jì)改革改變了中國的面貌和人民的日常生活"Economic reform…h(huán)as transformed China's landscape and its people's daily lives. Landscape的用法可以效仿。
(26)"美籍華人獨(dú)特的文化和……勤奮觀念加強(qiáng)了我們社會的凝聚力。" Chinese Americans' unique culture and values of … hard work have strengthened the fabric of our society. Fabric的用法值得學(xué)習(xí)。
(27)"每個(gè)國家都得根據(jù)自己的傳統(tǒng)尋找發(fā)展方案。"Each country has to look for development approaches within its own traditions. "Within"可以譯成"根據(jù)",那么在類似情況下,"根據(jù)"也可譯成within.
(28)"在零售和烹調(diào)行業(yè)方面,家辦企業(yè)的買賣完全超過了國家辦的。"In the retail and catering sectors, household operations have completely outmarketed the state. "household operations"和"outmarket"都可拿來為我所用。
四、天下無難事,只怕有心人。培訓(xùn)對語言的濃厚興趣,隨時(shí)隨地學(xué)習(xí)以英語為母語的人在不同場合對不同事物的表達(dá)方式。從中吸收對我有用的東西。
(29)我們在許多不同的場合都用"辛苦了"一詞,而英語國家的人則隨著情況的變化而變換說法。譬如,客人剛抵達(dá)時(shí),主人可以說:Did you have a good trip?某人辛勤工作后,就可以表揚(yáng)他:Thank you for your hard work.或You've been working hard!
但這次江主席在檢閱部隊(duì)時(shí)說,"同志們辛苦了!"(還有"同志們好!")怎樣翻譯,我沒有把握。至于"同志們好!"顯然不能譯成Hello或How are you之類。是否可以譯成:Salute!也許需要問問外國朋友。
再如:客人們抵達(dá)后,外國主人問道,"Would you like to make yourself comfortable?"我想,這正是我們平時(shí)所說"想方便一下么?"
(30)會談對英方人員說,We have to consult the opinions of a wide cross-section of people.這正是我們所說的"我們必須廣泛聽取各界人士的意見。"
(31)"憑票入場"外國人用"Admission is by ticket only."我們可以舉一反三,將"憑柬上一號觀禮臺"譯成"Admission by card only"or "Please present this card."Venue: Reviewing Stand 總之,各種各樣的英文材料、廣告、路標(biāo)、宣傳品等等都可作為學(xué)習(xí)材料。
后一點(diǎn),要跟上飛速發(fā)展的時(shí)代,不斷學(xué)習(xí)新出現(xiàn)的詞匯和知識。僅舉幾個(gè)例子。
(32)Quickionary 掃描器字典Telephovision 電視電話A not -for -profit group 非贏利集團(tuán)Megatrends Asia 《亞洲大趨勢》Quantum Fund 量子基金Hedge Fund 對沖基金
如果要從根本上來解決,還需要提高譯者的綜合素質(zhì),尤其是語言素質(zhì)和修養(yǎng),不僅漢語要好,英語尤要精通,而且知識面要廣。一般說來,譯者英語的造詣越深,其譯文中的Chinglish就越少。

