The earthquake is an enemy of mankind. No one likes or expects[looks forward to]（1） an earthquake， because it does great harm to people and destroys a lot of things， such as buildings， bridges， and roads.
My first experience of an earthquake is [was] （2） quite unusual， which happened last month. It was about 9：50 at night. [It happened last month， at about 9：50 at night.] （3） My parents had gone to sleep， but I was still watching TV. Suddenly I heard some noise from the TV set. I didn't know what was wrong with it. Instead of turning it off， I watched on. Pretty soon， I felt my chair shaking， and some glasses on the table fell off onto the floor. I got greatly surprised and didn't know what was happening.
Soon afterwards， I heard some shouts outside. Looking out of the window， I saw many people running into the streets， shouting：“Earthquake！”
“Earthquake！”I shouted to myself. Suddenly， something I had learned about earthquakes on TV came to my mind. Oh， dear！ Earthquakes are really terrible. They always bring disasters to people and pull down lots of buildings and houses. As I wondered [was wondering]（4） what to do， the floor stopped shaking and everything became quiet again. In fact， the earthquake had just happened. Yet， luckily enough， the earthquake came to an end， without doing any harm to people.
Such was my first experience of an earthquake. Though I felt afraid and strange （5） at that time， I learned something from it， which I will never forget in my life.
寧波萬里國際學校高一（1）班 陳檸
評 語
自己難忘的經(jīng)歷或感想，是很好的作文題材，因為是親身感受就會覺得有東西可寫。這篇文章在對地震發(fā)生時家具電器等的異常反應描寫得十分逼真，給文章增添了生動的色彩。文章中某些語言上的不足之處點評修改如下：
（1）expect表示主語等待著（他認為）會發(fā)生的事情，如：He expected John home at six. 這里根據(jù)上下文，作者想要表達的是人們不歡迎地震，改用（not） look forward to更好。
（2）這里應該用過去時。
（3）原句較松散，故改之。改后在unusual后用句號。
（4）這里用過去進行時，表示在wondering過程中，the floor stopped shaking…
（5）feel strange的意思并不等于漢語的“感到奇怪”，而是“感到不自在，不舒服”等，如：I felt strange and lonely when I first came to this place. 漢語中的“感到奇怪”其實是主語感到某事或某人奇怪，漢語可根據(jù)上下文把某事某人省去，而英語則不行。所以漢語“感到奇怪”寫成英文時要把相應的賓語加上去，如feel sth./sb. strange.或者用其他表達形式，如：I feel surprised…。這里根據(jù)上下文，作者的意思是感到地震表現(xiàn)出的情況奇怪，所以不能這樣用。如果作者想要表達的是“感到不自在、不舒服”，那就另當別論了。
My first experience of an earthquake is [was] （2） quite unusual， which happened last month. It was about 9：50 at night. [It happened last month， at about 9：50 at night.] （3） My parents had gone to sleep， but I was still watching TV. Suddenly I heard some noise from the TV set. I didn't know what was wrong with it. Instead of turning it off， I watched on. Pretty soon， I felt my chair shaking， and some glasses on the table fell off onto the floor. I got greatly surprised and didn't know what was happening.
Soon afterwards， I heard some shouts outside. Looking out of the window， I saw many people running into the streets， shouting：“Earthquake！”
“Earthquake！”I shouted to myself. Suddenly， something I had learned about earthquakes on TV came to my mind. Oh， dear！ Earthquakes are really terrible. They always bring disasters to people and pull down lots of buildings and houses. As I wondered [was wondering]（4） what to do， the floor stopped shaking and everything became quiet again. In fact， the earthquake had just happened. Yet， luckily enough， the earthquake came to an end， without doing any harm to people.
Such was my first experience of an earthquake. Though I felt afraid and strange （5） at that time， I learned something from it， which I will never forget in my life.
寧波萬里國際學校高一（1）班 陳檸
評 語
自己難忘的經(jīng)歷或感想，是很好的作文題材，因為是親身感受就會覺得有東西可寫。這篇文章在對地震發(fā)生時家具電器等的異常反應描寫得十分逼真，給文章增添了生動的色彩。文章中某些語言上的不足之處點評修改如下：
（1）expect表示主語等待著（他認為）會發(fā)生的事情，如：He expected John home at six. 這里根據(jù)上下文，作者想要表達的是人們不歡迎地震，改用（not） look forward to更好。
（2）這里應該用過去時。
（3）原句較松散，故改之。改后在unusual后用句號。
（4）這里用過去進行時，表示在wondering過程中，the floor stopped shaking…
（5）feel strange的意思并不等于漢語的“感到奇怪”，而是“感到不自在，不舒服”等，如：I felt strange and lonely when I first came to this place. 漢語中的“感到奇怪”其實是主語感到某事或某人奇怪，漢語可根據(jù)上下文把某事某人省去，而英語則不行。所以漢語“感到奇怪”寫成英文時要把相應的賓語加上去，如feel sth./sb. strange.或者用其他表達形式，如：I feel surprised…。這里根據(jù)上下文，作者的意思是感到地震表現(xiàn)出的情況奇怪，所以不能這樣用。如果作者想要表達的是“感到不自在、不舒服”，那就另當別論了。