為什么你的議論文寫作得不到高分?

字號(hào):

  多年的教學(xué)中,筆者批改了數(shù)以千計(jì)的議論文。從中發(fā)現(xiàn),大部分中國(guó)考生在寫議論文時(shí)的失分點(diǎn)實(shí)在可惜,因此,雅思專家總結(jié)和歸納了目前考生在寫議論中的十大失分點(diǎn),希望考生們?cè)趥淇紩r(shí)予以重視。 
     一、不一致 
    
  所謂不一致不光指主謂不一致,還包括了數(shù)的不一致、時(shí)態(tài)不一致以及代詞不一致等。
      比如:When one have money, he can do what he want to.
      分析:one是第三人稱單數(shù),因此本句的have應(yīng)改為has; want應(yīng)改為wants, 本句是典型的主謂不一致。
      改為:When one has money, he can do what he wants (to do). 
      二、修飾語錯(cuò)位 
    
  英語與漢語不同,同一個(gè)修飾語置于句子不同的位置,句子的含義可能引起變化。對(duì)于這一點(diǎn)考生們往往沒有引起足夠的重視,因而造成了不必要的誤解。
      比如:
      I believe I can do it well and I will better know the world outside the campus.
      分析:better位置不當(dāng),應(yīng)置于句末。 
      三、句子不完整 
    
  在口語中,交際雙方可借助手勢(shì)語氣上下文等,不完整的句子完全可以被理解??墒菚嬲Z就不同了,句子結(jié)構(gòu)不完整會(huì)令意思表達(dá)不清,這種情況常常在主句寫完以后,作者又想加些補(bǔ)充說明時(shí)發(fā)生。
      比如:There are many ways to know the society. for example by TV, radio, newspaper and so on.
      分析:本句后半部分"for example by TV, radio, newspaper and so on.”不是一個(gè)完整的句子,僅為一些不連貫的詞語,不能獨(dú)立成句。
      改為:There are many ways to know society, for example, by TV, radio, and newspaper. 
      四、懸垂修飾語 
    
  所謂懸垂修飾語是指句首的短語與后面句子的邏輯關(guān)系混亂不清。
      比如:at the age of ten, my grandfather died. 這句中"at the age of ten"只寫出十歲時(shí),但沒有說明“誰”十歲時(shí),按一般推理不可能是my grandfather, 如果我們把這個(gè)懸垂修飾語改得明確一點(diǎn),讀者或考官在讀句子時(shí)就不會(huì)誤解了。
      改為:When I was ten, my grandfather died. 
      To do well in college, good grades are essential.
      分析:句中不定式短語“to do well in college”的邏輯主語不清楚。
      改為:To do well in college, a student needs good grades. 
      五、詞性誤用 
    
  “詞性誤用”常表現(xiàn)為:介詞當(dāng)動(dòng)詞用;形容詞當(dāng)副詞用;名詞當(dāng)動(dòng)詞用等。這一點(diǎn)是目前考生最容易出錯(cuò)的地方。
      比如:None can negative the importance of money.
      分析:negative系形容詞,誤作動(dòng)詞。
      改為:None can deny the importance of money. 
      六、指代不清 
    
  指代不清主要講的是代詞與被指代的人或物關(guān)系不清,或者先后所用的代詞不一致。
      比如:Mary was friendly to my sister because she wanted her to be her bridesmaid.
      讀完上面這一句話,讀者無法明確地判斷兩位姑娘中誰將結(jié)婚,誰將當(dāng)伴娘。如果我們把易于引起誤解的代詞所指代的對(duì)象加以明確,意思就一目了然了。這個(gè)句子可改為:
      Mary was friendly to my sister because she wanted my sister to be her bridesmaid.
      比如:We can also know the society by serving it yourself.
      分析:句中人稱代詞we和反身代詞yourself指代不一致。
      改為:We can also know society by serving it ourselves. 
      七、不間斷句子 
    
  這個(gè)錯(cuò)誤的出現(xiàn)受中文意識(shí)的影響很大。很多考生在寫句子時(shí),句子之間缺乏有效的連接成分。甚至,有的句子寫的比較中式化。
      比如:There are many ways we get to know the outside world.
      分析:這個(gè)句子包含了兩層完整的意思:“there are many ways”以及“we get to know the outside world”。簡(jiǎn)單地把它們連在一起就不妥當(dāng)了。
      改為:
      There are many ways for us to learn about the outside world. 或:
      There are many ways through which we can become acquainted with the outside world. 
      八、措詞毛病 
    
  學(xué)生在寫作中沒有養(yǎng)成良好的推敲,斟酌句子中所選用詞的習(xí)慣。大部分考生隨心所欲,拿來就用,所以作文中用詞不當(dāng)?shù)腻e(cuò)誤隨處可見。
      比如:The increasing use of chemical obstacles in agriculture also makes pollution.
      分析:顯然,考生把obstacles“障礙”,“障礙物”誤作substance“物質(zhì)”了。另外“the increasing use(不斷增加的使用)”應(yīng)改為“abusive use(濫用)”。
      改為:The abusive use of chemical substances in agriculture also causes/leads to pollution. 
      九、累贅 
    
  寫句子沒有一個(gè)多余的詞;寫段落沒有一個(gè)無必要的句子。能用單詞的不用詞組;能用詞組的不用從句或句子。
      比如:In spite of the fact that he is lazy, I like him.
      本句的“the fact that he is lazy”系同謂語從句,我們按照上述“能用詞組的不用從句”可以改為:In spite of his laziness, I like him. 
      比如:For the people who are diligent and kind, money is just the thing to be used to buy the thing they need.
      整個(gè)句子可以大大簡(jiǎn)化為:
      Diligent people use money only to buy what they need. 
      十、不連貫 
    
  不連貫是指一個(gè)句子前言不對(duì)后語,或是結(jié)構(gòu)上不暢通,這也是考生常犯的毛病。
      比如:The fresh water, it is the most important things of the earth.
      分析:the fresh water與逗號(hào)后的it不連貫,it與things在數(shù)方面不一致。